James Weir recaps Farmer Needs A Spouse: Man dumps all ladies, leaves alone

A whole harem of ladies is dumped and flown again to the massive smoke on a Rex flight throughout Tuesday’s episode of Farmer Needs A Spouse after one of many stockmen decides he can’t quit the real love of his life: pineapples.

It’s a story as previous as time.

Boy meets ladies. Women fall in love with boy. Boy will get annoyed that ladies don’t appear to know his pineapple crop takes precedence. Women are given the flick by the disgusted boy – as in the event that they’re merely chunks of pineapple on a Hawaiian pizza.

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With the finale proper across the nook, our farmers set off on their final dates. They’ll quickly be tasked with whittling down their flocks from three to 2 to 1. However farmer Bert has a secret. He needs to do away with the flock totally.

He ditches the ultimate dates. All of a sudden, he’s lacking. The women are left questioning what’s fallacious. They might really feel one thing was off. For days now, Bert’s manner has been spiky — just like the pineapples within the paddock the place he has remoted himself.

“Coming into this expertise, I used to be searching for somebody to share my life with. I believe all the women are great. However … I don’t have what it takes to be in a relationship proper now,” he tells us whereas staring out at his beloved pineapples.

“Um … I simply don’t have the … yeah … emotional time to be the particular person persons are deserving of. I simply don’t have the time.”

It’s just like the previous adage goes: the one factor extra demanding than a harem stuffed with actuality TV girlfriends is a area stuffed with pineapples.

“The fruit is just not gonna decide itself,” Bert declares.

So true. It is best to get that as a tattoo.

As evening falls, the women begin to fear. They sit down on the dinner desk and wait. Karli has even made her well-known salad in an try and lure Bert again.

When he finally stumbles in, he’s pale and smells of pineapple juice.

“At this level, the expertise is gonna finish for us,” he tells them. “I simply don’t assume I can hold going on this expertise.”

Karli takes it the toughest. She has been waking up on the morning time for weeks now, diligently faux tanning and straightening her hair. All that tough yakka for nothin’.

One massive query looms: Why join a present to search out love in case you don’t desire a relationship?

“I used to be absolutely open to the concept of falling in love,” Bert insists. “I used to be. I assume, alongside the best way, the stress of all of it, the workload, every thing, simply acquired an excessive amount of. Earlier than I begin a relationship with any person I wanna be pleased with the farm, pleased with my life.”

The women are escorted to the D-MAX and it speeds away down the Bruce Freeway. They’ll by no means eat pineapple once more.

Fb: @hellojamesweir

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